The Darkness

Sludge.

Thick, oozing darkness

that tempts me, lures me in.

I ponder my options,

scanning, thinking,

how should I choose?

And then stirs within me:

my secret passion.

I confess my addiction,

I feel so helpless.

I crave it,

I yearn for the darkness

to overcome me,

to sharpen, awaken, arouse my senses:

its smell, entices me

the anticipation, draws me in

its taste, that divine sensation,

like angels dancing on the tongue!

I swallow its goodness down willingly,

sad when the final segment disappears.

The stomach, now full,

the soul still wanting.

How long till our blissful reunion?

Must I really wait another day,

for the Marmite blackness to surround
me again?

Teacher's TV Competition

It seems that it's competition time in the writing world. Actually, I found a list of competitions the other day, which provided pretty such a long list you could occupy yourself pretty much full-time just creating competition pieces!

I've entered two this month: one can be read on http://greenstory.co.uk which is being run by Green Metropolis (a fabulous website). You can read it all there. The other is a monologue for Teacher's TV, which will be filmed and broadcast on the channel. Just for fun, I thought I would share it with you. The brief was to come up with a monologue of under 1,000 words which reflects an aspect or experience of teaching. So guess what I wrote about.......


“A wonderful way to learn!”



[Woman, ca 40 walks into a room and starts to pour herself a coffee. She sits down at a table, puts her papers and books down in a neat pile. There is a sense of relief in her to be sitting down and having some quiet]


Woman:

Wow, what a session that was! It amazes me how keen they are to learn, and how they go from one thing to another at such a blistering pace! I can hardly keep up with them! Take this morning for instance – I had planned to do ½ hour of Maths, ½ hour of English, then take a break. That should have taken us up to 10:15. And here I am now, only just sitting down and it's already half-eleven! These hours are scandalous – we should have a union!

We started off alright, then about 20 minutes into it, Naomi suddenly asks: “Why did the Egyptians live in pyramids?”. My instinct was to suppress it, to say “Ask me later when we're doing history”, but I'm trying to get that out of my system. I've come to learn over the years that when a child asks, she's ready to learn. Much better to teach her there and then, than to try and do it to your schedule when she's not ready and won't take it in. So off we went...

“What do you know about Egyptians already?” I wisely countered. She shrugged in that special way that only six year olds can. I smiled: this was going to fun. We could start anywhere, and she would be delighted with wherever we ended up! Emily opened up Google, Liesl fetched the Encyclopaedia of World History and Naomi brought us all pencils, crayons and paper. Two hours later, and each of them can tell you anything you could possibly want to know about embalming, canopic jars and brain-through-the-nose-pulling-hooks! We translated hieroglyphs, studied the desert terrain, built sphinxes out of Cornflakes boxes and loo rolls, all accompanied by rousing choruses of “Donny Osmond & his Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat”!

That's what I love most about the way that we learn together: it's whole-brain, whole-child learning, and most importantly, it's child-led and child-centred. We focus on people, on their beliefs and values, on their cultures, their triumphs and challenges. It's their learning, so it has to be centred around them. The girls have to invest as much into it as I do, so it's imperative that they lead it. I provide a framework for them, and start the ball rolling, but they are ultimately responsible for which direction it goes in. That way, they know that their input and questions are valid, as are their opinions of what we learn about. Now that Naomi's Egyptian curiosity has been satisfied for now, she will be much more willing to sit down and tackle her Maths book tomorrow morning.


[Camera pans out to reveal not a staffroom but a home kitchen]


They're all out in the garden at the moment. I'll give them ten minutes or so while I do the crossword, then we'll all need to wrap up warm – we're going to see the seals at Donna Nook this afternoon. We do it every year, it's become something of a family tradition now. After that they're off to my Mum's for an hour while I get the tea on. She's teaching them to play the piano. They're coming on great guns too! Two of them work on a jigsaw of the world while the third has a twenty minute lesson, then they all swap round. I bet they'll find Egypt well enough tonight! [Aside] Actually, I might have time to get a load of washing in the machine as well while the pasta's boiling.

It's a busy life as a home-educating mum, but I wouldn't change it for the world. It's given me the chance to get to know my children as individuals really, really well. I could never have done that when they were at school 40 hours a week. It's great here: there's no bullying, no swearing or drugs, no last minute inspections! And most of all, no pressure. I don't need to apply pressure, they can't learn enough – everything they do is learning. They're always pulling leaves off things in the garden then coming inside to find out what they're from. Their bedrooms are full of dead insects, posters of whales and rabbits and goodness knows what else. Our camera runs out of film really quickly these days, because they're constantly snapping some wild creature or other, and taking pictures for their latest nature study. The shelves are full of learning books, and projects they've finished: everything from the Romans, to dolphins, to ballet, to Shakespeare. And what's even better, is that I get to learn it all with them. Sure, there's the odd day when I could quite happily do some ballistics research on them, but those are few and far between. My pupils are also my best friends. It's just the three girls and me, and a whole big universe to learn about... together!

Latest projects

I'm working on a novel at the moment called "7". Before you ask, it has nothing to do with psycho-horror films from the 90's, cardinal virtues, deadly sins or seals from the Book of Revelation.

"7" is the name lovingly given to a small, unofficial organisation which carries out such unauthorised tasks as the Government deems 'necessary'. Since MI5 deals with legitimate internal security, and MI6 deals with external security, it seemed like 7 followed on quite naturally!

The story follows a man known as 'Hodgins', who has been working for 7 for the last few years. Because 7's work is completely illegal and utterly immoral, agents only work for five years, after which they are given a new identity and a tonne of cash and are 'retired' to a destination of their choice, on the proviso that they never set foot in the country again. The problem is, Hodgins is starting to suspect that his understanding of 'being retired' might differ from that of his superiors...

The action starts at the Priory, a famous mental health clinic specialising in difficult cases. Hodgins is sitting in the office of Dr Anthony Wilkinson, a psychiatrist of great renown. He is having trouble coming to terms with the things he has done and needs to talk to someone about it. The problem is, how do you go about blowing the whistle on an organisation that doesn't exist? And even if you blow as loud as you can, will anyone listen, and what can they do about it anyway?

I'll post little of bits of it up here soon for you to peruse and comment on. Hope you like the idea!!

Romeo's Soliloquy

Imagine the scene: teenagers Romeo and Juliet, born of violently opposed families, have fallen madly in love. Realizing their fate, arrange to meet in secret at the church to marry and elope, but as Juliet makes her way there, news arrives that Romeo has been killed in battle with her brother. Heartbroken, she takes a poison that will make her appear dead for a short time (till her parents have been), then she will wake up. Romeo arrives at the church expecting to find Juliet waiting for wedlock, but instead, finds her apparently dead. And this is where my soliloquy begins...

"The universe, spectacularly aligned to seal my fate!
Pierced by longing, like a worm boring through a heart content,
now the dull throb of a once-sprained leg
which no hands can restore to vigour.

A hunger growing, cancerous, expanding,
replacing healthy tissue with emptiness -
nay, not inactive emptiness but active yearning,
searing longing for that which the Gods deny me!

Why I? The hail of each sore with life -
why this flesh so cursed and tortured must be?
What folly shall I have raised?
What immortal displeasure have I incurred,
that I must suffer and writhe in the agony of my remaining?

And why she? Can Gods not be patient too, but missing her,
they expend their omnipotence in theiving souls too soon from this world,
Why must she tatse the wine of such untimely ends?
Why she, be so tortured and wanting of esteem
that such apothecary only solace could lend?
What cause, great Gods, be so urgent as her theft can fulfil,
while earth moans and souls die at her demise?

And less of Gods, yet what of I, my soul - or the ash that remains,
whose lifeless, greying mass no form entrusts?
Is life henceforth?
Can breath hold true, for seems me, there is less air tonight.
Was ever point or sense or cause to wage the ongoing war of continuance,
when ere was joy and laughter sweet as birdsong,
now gives way to the thundering quiet of loneliness.

These lips I press once more 'gainst mine.
Erst pink as roses, now bilberry blue and icicles on a face -
how swiftly life is sucked away through those fading eyes
as death takes on life breathing its silence into once reverberating lung.

Sweet Juliet, in my heart already wife, now distant, tragic torn from this scene,
make space for me where torment no longer grinds.
With wide arms greet me, with flowing hair as branches on a spring bough
welcome me, sweet Juliet.

Be swift my sword, oh merciful steel, thy cold, uncaring hilt to my bosom press!
Rejoice, oh my heart, take place again with your love,
as phoenix rising from the flame, I swear, love will live again!
and in dying, is love reborn on wings of eternity -
on bright bounteous wings together we at last shall fly!"

"This could be the start of something new..."

...

I hate to quote from High School Musical, but it just seemed to be appropriate, given the circumstances!!

I decided it would a good idea to separate my writing from my other blog - that way my future editors don't have to wade through tales of chicken feed and rapidly-growing triffids in order to find the first teasing chapter of my latest navel!!

So here below over the coming months, you'll find poems, short stories, articles and chapters or excerpts from books I'm working on. Because you are all so wise, I'd LOVE your feedback!! Please let me know what you think of it - be gentle! but be honest. This is something I'm incredibly excited to be doing, but it's very scary, so I need all the feedback and advice I can get!

Many many thankings!! Oh and don't worry, I promise to remember you all when I'm famous!!:D